Well, for those of you who don't follow me on Facebook, life has been...interesting. Who was it that said something like 'May you live in interesting times...' While a less educated person may perceive this as a blessing, it is in fact meant to be a curse. If someone says that to you, they are wishing you a life full of upheaval and chaos. Well, it's safe to say someone slapped me upside the head with the 'interesting times' curse. There was the whole bit with my daughter (I'm sorry, blood or no blood, hurt or no hurt, this child is now and will always be my daughter.) I won't rehash that except to say she's been home for two weeks and the only reason I know she made it off the plane alive is because I saw pictures of her at the fair two days later on Facebook. (I had to go looking...it wasn't as though they were shared with me directly or even indirectly.)
Around about this time I realized that my luggage had been robbed on the way home from Hawaii. ALL of my shoes (cept my flip flops and a pair that had been zipped up in hiding), my Adidas Sneakers, all my Sephora makeup, and my prescription Versace glasses. All my skin care products (ladies, do I have to tell you how much that can add up to? I think not.) I wrote to U. S. AIRWAYs ( did you get that all right? U S AIRWAYS. Let me say it again...U S AIRWAYS) the moment I realized it had happened. Do let me share with you their response: (Since they were ever so polite about it.)
Thank you for contacting the Central Baggage Resolution Office at US
Regrettably, when a customer receives his/her property and does not
report the occurrence of this type of baggage irregularity within 24
hours, we cannot honor any subsequent claim.
We appreciate this opportunity to address your email.
Central Baggage Resolution Office
That unexplained smoke you saw on the horizon yesterday? That was coming out of my ears. I wrote back. *smirk* I was ever. so. polite. I swear. No, really. But I did sign the response: One Very Pissed Off Woman Who Spends A Lot Of Her Time In The Public Eye. *smirk* Let's see how polite they are this time around. I do hate to throw my weight around (since there's so little of it anymore) but sometimes, man, you just gotta show them that they don't have all the power in this world. I mean I had to PAY to have the luggage on the flight in the first damn place, and then they let it get ROBBED??? The least my money can do is protect what's in the thing! I mean, UPS does it. Why can't they??
Then I stood up and broke my damn foot. (Only I could possibly manage this.) I had been writing for about an hour an a half (good on me!! I'd been having trouble finding the muse for months, but boy was it flowing that day! Deadlines can be very inspiring!) and apparently my foot fell asleep. I say apparently because there was no tingle or pins or needles. It just clocked out. I didn't even realize it was numb. So I stood up (kay, so I more likely flung myself up out of my chair. I never do things slowly anymore! Getting skinny gives you bounce!) One foot worked and the other folded and I unknowingly put all my weight on it (all what, 147 lbs of me? I mean c'mon! How did this not happen 175 lbs ago??) and heard a loud snap. I didn't fall or collapse or feel pain or anything (I was numb remember.) So I sat down on the coffee table and started repeating the same phrase over and over again. "Oh shit. Oh shit! OH SHIT!" (So sue me, even a writer can't be eloquent in a moment like that!) The worst part about that moment was realizing that I was alone. I mean really alone. If not for my dear friend and neighbor next door, I had no one to call for help outside of 911. And I loathed calling my neighbor because she had ben sick all day. Even when I did call her I said, "Donna, I'm so sorry to bother you...but i think I broke my foot."
I'm one of those people who hates to leaves a large needy footprint on others. Yet, somehow, I always manage to do so. Poor Donna's been working overtime taking care of me since I can't bend over or reach up or stay upright (nothing to do with the foot, actually. I'm a friggin' klutz with or without crutches. Just ask anyone who came to last year's Author's After Dark)...or the EMTs that carried me off that Saturday afternoon as I apparently skipped like a broken record and asked over and over again 'Where's Bianca?" So, in under a year that's a concussion, several broken toes, a broken foot...anyone remember anything else? Do complications from surgery count?
Then I found out the hard way that Mac's PAGES (their version of WORD) does not have an autosave feature. WTF?!?!?!? What the hell kind of a word processing program or any kind of program that deals with data management these days does not have an autosave feature???? PAGES, that's what kind. All this time all my corrections, all my work, if the battery ran down on my computer it was completely lost. I never realized it...not until I lost three thousand words. That's three thousand words of Nightwalker nirvana you all will never get to read because...let's face it, I can't remember what I had for breakfast this morning. I don't remember what is in my own books!
So, this is my interesting life. I don't know if my professional life can top that. Do let's hope not!! I'll be happy and content with reasonably successful. :)
I am about to release three successive books.
DRINK OF ME and
Okay if you aren't up on all thinks Jacki....that last book, yeah, that's me. JAX. It's me...sexified. Hey, is too a word! Imagine what I could write that's too hot for my regular books... (Yikes! After the short story in NOCTURNAL, I'm not sure they drew that line soon enough!!) Well, the JAX name is all my uber sexified work. Okay, I'll call it erotica if I must. ;) It's the only one scheduled for the moment. We'll see how it does. :) So that's September, October and November releases. Save your pennies, chicks. Oh and I really would love any and all feedback you have about these latest works. Just submit and email through the website or directly to email@example.com.
I'll write again soon. With AAD coming up there should be a lot to talk about. Thanks for listening to my interesting life. ;)
Oh and don't forget, if you are in the NY NJ CT area, Authors After Dark is opening their signing to ALL COMERS so you can get all your books signed! Go to my site to check on details. The author list is dated though. Let me try and get it fixed for you. You can even buy NOCTURNAL right there and have it signed by both me and JESS HAINES...and we have signed bookplates from Kate Douglas since she tried but couldn't make it. Next year's author line up is looking really hot if everyone who says they are going to come comes! And we have some super cool surprises planned.
Hugs and Kitties